By Evi Dekker-Weger (Nieuwe Mama’s)
In my 2 previous blogs you gained more insight into the connection with yourself and how you can consciously look for it more often. You may have already started working on it in the meantime and have applied some of the tips. Was it easy for you or did you run into blockages? You may even have the feeling that living in connection isn’t quite as easy and fun as you expected. That’s fine and certainly doesn’t mean you’re doing it wrong: I got you!
I write this blog for a reason, of course: I want to challenge you to persevere and not to lose heart. Especially when it feels exciting or you feel that life in connection is not for you. If you keep playing with it and give it a chance, the most beautiful things can happen for you and a lot will change (positive).
Let yourself grow
We hear often that if we live in connection with ourselves and really listen to our dreams and desires, anything is possible and we can create our most beautiful life. And although I largely agree with this, I also think it is very important to inform you that it is possible you don’t feel that way right away. And you will certainly not manifest your most beautiful life within one day without any effort. Organizing your life by completely trusting your inner wisdom takes courage, a lot of trust and taking difficult choices.
It also means that you can get to know yourself completely, bring out everything in yourself, dare to look at all fears, all doubts and all ugly sides of yourself. It is certainly not the route with less obstacles, pain, frustration and of least resistance. But what it certainly is is the path that will bring you satisfaction, allow yourself to grow and prosper, and the path is for you to map out all by yourself – however you wish.
Jumping without a plan
I mention this by telling you that you are meant to encounter bumps, frustrations and pain if you trust your gut feeling. Also making exciting choices and having bloody honest conversations are part of this. Seeing traits you don’t like about yourself and uttering words that someone else might not appreciate; listening to what you feel and trust the decisions you make – even if they don’t seem logical and you may not be understood by those around you; it’s all part of it.
Just like discovering new talents, special qualities, hidden treasures; living adventures and gaining experiences. Which you would never have had if you didn’t followed your heart, had not mustered the courage, had not dared to jump without plan and control.
Let it go
Letting go in particular can be an enormous challenge. Living from connection invites you to let go of control over what seemed controllable until now; it asks you to let go of that which seemed safe to that which excites you; it shows you that what felt certain was never certain and that sometimes taking a risk is the only way to experience more love and happiness. In addition, it asks you to look at your life from a different perspective, to be open to new insights and it gives you the opportunity to rearrange everything according to your own rules and conditions – to live your way.
Fall and rise
This can evoke a sense of freedom and curiosity, but it can also feel unstable, risky and insecure. It can be both: the enthusiasm next to the uncertainty, the curiosity next to the fear, the freedom next to the desire for stability and security.
Living from connection is – as you see and may have already experienced yourself – not just about roses. It is difficult and can be full of challenges, especially in the beginning – when you are still so attached to living in apparent security and in the way you are used to. It may also be hard for you, because as soon as you dare to be honest with yourself and your environment, you will notice that your honesty is not always appreciated and it can be very tempting to shoot back into old patterns. Know that that too is not a disaster! It’s only logical and human. I don’t know (and am) no one who manages to always and at any time of the day make all the choices from connection or to choose consciously. Sometimes I find it ridiculously tiring and laborious and I’ve had it with all that growing, developing and listening to my feelings, but in the end I always return to it – because I know that only in this way can I be my authentic self and can realize my desires.
No short cuts
If someone promises you that it is easy, that it takes no effort and that living in connection is only fun and wonderful, then you can be sure that they have never tried to really live in connection. That’s why I can’t stand all those ‘happiness gurus’ who tell you that anything is possible if you just believe in it. Don’t get me wrong: Visualizing and manifesting are powerful and beautiful tools to create your most beautiful life, but without taking the bumps, looking at dark sides, without courage and confidence, without actually taking steps, you will get there. do not come!
There is no short cut and no quick fix. It’s all part of it and we can only grow in it if we are willing to learn the lessons that come with it.
How can you deal with it when things go wrong or if you experience a setback, despite having trusted your gut so much?
Be aware and listen to what is happening in you at that moment. What feelings arise? Where does the pain or frustration come from? What lesson can you learn in this?
Give yourself permission to be angry, tired, sad… and feel the pain and then try to return to the connection with yourself to re-tune and listen to the answers to the answers you need.
Being aware of this and seeking the connection is an ongoing process and there will also be periods when you feel the connection less or do not feel the need to look for it. Do not expect too much of yourself and give yourself the space to discover how you want to fill in this process – that is of course also possible in your own way.
My last tip is therefore: keep trying it, play with it, see what this process may look like for you and give yourself all the time to discover what works for you.
Keep looking for the connection and be amazed!
If you have any questions you can always send me an email at: email@example.com, I like to think along with you if you get stuck in something.
And if you want to deepen the connection with yourself through valuable insights and clarifying exercises, sign up here for the FREE masterclass: CONNECTION – The connection with yourself, which you can do at your own pace, where and when you need it (online ) can follow.
Love and trust your process,
Evi – New Mamas