Why living in connection is difficult (and how you can still do it)

By Evi Dekker-Weger (Nieuwe Mama’s) 

In my 2 previous blogs you gained more insight into the connection with yourself and how you can consciously look for it more often. You may have already started working on it in the meantime and have applied some of the tips. Was it easy for you or did you run into blockages? You may even have the feeling that living in connection isn’t quite as easy and fun as you expected. That’s fine and certainly doesn’t mean you’re doing it wrong: I got you!

I write this blog for a reason, of course: I want to challenge you to persevere and not to lose heart. Especially when it feels exciting or you feel that life in connection is not for you. If you keep playing with it and give it a chance, the most beautiful things can happen for you and a lot will change (positive).

Let yourself grow

We hear often that if we live in connection with ourselves and really listen to our dreams and desires, anything is possible and we can create our most beautiful life. And although I largely agree with this, I also think it is very important to inform you that it is possible you don’t feel that way right away. And you will certainly not manifest your most beautiful life within one day without any effort. Organizing your life by completely trusting your inner wisdom takes courage, a lot of trust and taking difficult choices.

It also means that you can get to know yourself completely, bring out everything in yourself, dare to look at all fears, all doubts and all ugly sides of yourself. It is certainly not the route with less obstacles, pain, frustration and of least resistance. But what it certainly is is the path that will bring you satisfaction, allow yourself to grow and prosper, and the path is for you to map out all by yourself – however you wish.

Jumping without a plan 

I mention this by telling you that you are meant to encounter bumps, frustrations and pain if you trust your gut feeling. Also making exciting choices and having bloody honest conversations are part of this. Seeing traits you don’t like about yourself and uttering words that someone else might not appreciate; listening to what you feel and trust the decisions you make – even if they don’t seem logical and you may not be understood by those around you; it’s all part of it.

Just like discovering new talents, special qualities, hidden treasures; living adventures and gaining experiences. Which you would never have had if you didn’t followed your heart, had not mustered the courage, had not dared to jump without plan and control.

Let it go

Letting go in particular can be an enormous challenge. Living from connection invites you to let go of control over what seemed controllable until now; it asks you to let go of that which seemed safe to that which excites you; it shows you that what felt certain was never certain and that sometimes taking a risk is the only way to experience more love and happiness. In addition, it asks you to look at your life from a different perspective, to be open to new insights and it gives you the opportunity to rearrange everything according to your own rules and conditions – to live your way.

Fall and rise

This can evoke a sense of freedom and curiosity, but it can also feel unstable, risky and insecure. It can be both: the enthusiasm next to the uncertainty, the curiosity next to the fear, the freedom next to the desire for stability and security.

Living from connection is – as you see and may have already experienced yourself – not just about roses. It is difficult and can be full of challenges, especially in the beginning – when you are still so attached to living in apparent security and in the way you are used to. It may also be hard for you, because as soon as you dare to be honest with yourself and your environment, you will notice that your honesty is not always appreciated and it can be very tempting to shoot back into old patterns. Know that that too is not a disaster! It’s only logical and human. I don’t know (and am) no one who manages to always and at any time of the day make all the choices from connection or to choose consciously. Sometimes I find it ridiculously tiring and laborious and I’ve had it with all that growing, developing and listening to my feelings, but in the end I always return to it – because I know that only in this way can I be my authentic self and can realize my desires.

No short cuts

If someone promises you that it is easy, that it takes no effort and that living in connection is only fun and wonderful, then you can be sure that they have never tried to really live in connection. That’s why I can’t stand all those ‘happiness gurus’ who tell you that anything is possible if you just believe in it. Don’t get me wrong: Visualizing and manifesting are powerful and beautiful tools to create your most beautiful life, but without taking the bumps, looking at dark sides, without courage and confidence, without actually taking steps, you will get there. do not come!

There is no short cut and no quick fix. It’s all part of it and we can only grow in it if we are willing to learn the lessons that come with it.

How can you deal with it when things go wrong or if you experience a setback, despite having trusted your gut so much?

Be aware and listen to what is happening in you at that moment. What feelings arise? Where does the pain or frustration come from? What lesson can you learn in this?

Give yourself permission to be angry, tired, sad… and feel the pain and then try to return to the connection with yourself to re-tune and listen to the answers to the answers you need.

Being aware of this and seeking the connection is an ongoing process and there will also be periods when you feel the connection less or do not feel the need to look for it. Do not expect too much of yourself and give yourself the space to discover how you want to fill in this process – that is of course also possible in your own way.

My last tip is therefore: keep trying it, play with it, see what this process may look like for you and give yourself all the time to discover what works for you.

Keep looking for the connection and be amazed!

If you have any questions you can always send me an email at: hello@nieuwe-mamas.nl, I like to think along with you if you get stuck in something.

And if you want to deepen the connection with yourself through valuable insights and clarifying exercises, sign up here for the FREE masterclass: CONNECTION – The connection with yourself, which you can do at your own pace, where and when you need it (online ) can follow.

Love and trust your process,  

Evi – New Mamas

Do you recognize this? Sometimes motherhood is more about surviving rather than living fully.

Do you recognize this? Sometimes (working) motherhood is more about surviving instead of living fully…

When you were pregnant you probably had ideas about motherhood, what it would be like and how you would implement it. You have arranged a nice crèche or childminder and you may be taking some extra leave. And you’ve decided never let your children have breakfast in front of the TV… Certain things you would do exactly as your parents did. Other things you would do very differently because you have your own ideas about it.

But in real live it turns out to be so different from what you had previously thought. Something with theory and practice.

When you have just given birth, it is of course fan-tas-tic to finally be able to hold your little one in your arms. But it is also, very often, looking for a new rhythm with the three of you. And there are sometimes factors that can make that first period extra difficult. Maybe giving birth was tough and the physical recovery also takes its time. Or did you want to give your baby breastfeed but that doesn’t go the way you hoped. Does your little one cry a lot and you have no idea why. And even if everything goes very well with your child, it is a period of searching for a new balance as a family. And with each subsequent child, it is also a search for a new rhythm with each other.

If you have found a bit of routine as a new mother, you often start working again fairly quickly, and you have to switch again. Perhaps you are one of those mothers who are really looking forward to going back to work. So that you can have something for yourself again and maybe you are dreading having to go back to work and leave your little one with someone else. But however you stand, the inevitable moment when you have to go back to work will come anyway. And just to reassure you, before you know it you’ll be back in the rhythm and you as a family are used to this new situation.

But then there are so many things that you “MUST” do…that as a mother you quickly slide down…..

– you take care of your child(ren), – you have to work, – the household has to be done, – you still have a social life and want to maintain it, – you have to exercise to stay fit

The result is that you often get out of bed tired and that the days almost seem to pass by. You might even ask yourself, ‘Is this it? Being a mother and how I had envisioned it?”.

You are surviving instead of living to the fullest!

But know that there is another way! Motherhood is the perfect entrance for your personal development and growth. If you are willing to really explore what is important to you and what matters to you in life, now is the perfect opportunity

And if you dare to seize this opportunity, you will go from survival to living life to the fullest!

In this first article I challenge you to do some self-examination. This will help you in order to change things. The following articles will help you to make sure the changes are permanent.

Are you ready?!… Let’s get started:

Before you start, make sure you take some time for yourself. Make sure you are in a place where you cannot be disturbed, put your mobile on silent and put on some nice music. Make sure you have a nice cup of tea or coffee and a pen and paper so you can write.

I would like to ask you to do a writing exercise based on ‘Flow’ writing. How does that work… You are supposed to write about a certain topic for about 10 minutes continuously. I’ll give you the topic you can write about. If you have no idea what to write, just write that. The intention is to keep writing so that you really write from your feelings and your intuition. Do not get too much in your head. It often provides wonderful insights into your way of thinking and helps you to make decisions.

If this is new to you, know that the often you do this the easier it will be. In the beginning it can take a little time. And know that there is no right or wrong but that it is really your process.

The sentence you can write about is the following:

The grade I give to my current life is a…. Because….(write!)

ps. It’s not necessarily about the number, but what the number stands for.

If you like you can share the insights with me via info@coachannelief.com. I am curious whether you are satisfied with your current life situation. Or you are mainly surviving instead of living. If you have any questions about the exercise or about the results of the exercise, feel free to email me or send a DM via instagram @coachannelief. I would like to think along with you.

Would you like to receive more tips? Download my e-book for free with 6 concrete steps to a life in balance!

https://coachannel12033.activehosted.com/f/6 For more information you can take a look at my website: https://coachannelief.nl/ Or follow me on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/coachannelief/ You’re also more than welcome in my free community: https://www.facebook.com/groups/Moedersinbalans

Until the next article!

3 simple tips to strengthen the connection with yourself

PART 2: 3 simple tips to strengthen the connection with yourself By Evi Dekker-Weger (New Mama’s)

In my last blog I discussed what the ‘connection with yourself’ means and how you can (re) find it. As promised, in this new blog I share how you can strengthen the connection with yourself in 3 simple ways and make more frequent contact with your ‘inner voice’.

You have probably heard or felt your inner voice – a soft, powerful direction indicator within yourself – before. Maybe you often follow her advice, maybe you ignore it because it seems too exciting, too illogical or too risky – but chances are you know exactly what I’m talking about.

My story When I first became aware of this powerful feeling I didn’t know what to do with it. Her advice felt right, but on the other hand, it didn’t suit me at all. It didn’t fit into my life, I would have to adjust everything and every step I came up with would take away all stability and certainty – I (who loved certainty and preferably had a plan for every situation) was of course not going to do that !

In this way I continued to follow what felt logical, clear and safe to me – until I encountered myself hard. I was in a relationship that felt safe, but that I didn’t love enough from the beginning. I was studying to prove something, without being really passionate about the subject. I did what I thought I had to do because everyone else did it and got so used to it that I had no idea what I really wanted.

Slowly the feeling in myself became bigger and stronger. I felt trapped, increasingly unhappy and couldn’t ignore it no matter how hard I tried.

I had no choice but to be brave and follow my gut. That’s how I left my boyfriend and with that the group of friends I had been part of for 5 years. Later I went on a trip, emigrated to the Netherlands and eventually also stopped my studies. I left everything behind, had no idea what the future was going to look like and I had no plan A or B for the first time.

However, as soon as I had let go of everything, there was room for the new, for what my ‘inner voice’ had been talking about all along. The reward for this difficult, brave leap came in the form of my dream man, my family, new friendships, new opportunities and the best part: more confidence in myself and my feelings.

Of course, I don’t always manage to be completely guided by my feelings. I still find it exciting and often illogical, but I am increasingly able to be aware of what is being asked of me and to trust that it will work out, even if there is no plan.

Three techniques In the meantime I have also discovered 3 simple ways that help me to restore and strengthen the connection with myself, when I get stuck, get frustrated and notice that I find it difficult to listen to my inner voice.

I would like to share these 3 techniques with you, which you can apply anytime and anywhere:

1. BREATH When you feel restless and experience inner tension, this is one of the easiest techniques to apply right away: Stand still or sit for a while, close your eyes and breathe in and out 3 times deeply. Focus only on your breathing and your heart rate. Perhaps soothing words arise, you see colors before you or feelings arise that you can listen to.

This is one of the most powerful exercises to immediately experience the connection with yourself again.

2. FOLLOW THE JOY Sometimes we feel like everything is going wrong. We are late for an appointment, coffee spills on our newly put on shirts, the dishwasher suddenly breaks down, our genius idea is not understood and the work meeting turns out differently than we had hoped. Instead of following the tendency (which we often have) to immediately fix everything and come up with a plan B as quickly as possible – the solution sometimes lies in slowing down and letting go. Stop running and stick to your schedule and do something that makes you happy. It doesn’t have to be useful and it doesn’t have to be profitable. Ask yourself: What do I want to do now? What would make me happiest now? Trust your gut and let’s go!

This way you not only reconnect with yourself, but you also open your heart and mind to creativity and solutions that are less obvious, but which you may be much more enthusiastic about.

3. CHILD’S POSE When we had recently had a stressful day and both my youngest son and I were tired and overstimulated, he got angry before I put him to bed. Crying and furious, he went into child’s pose and there was no way I could change him. I got frustrated, but when I saw him lying there like that I thought: ‘Hm, that seems pretty nice to me too!’ I lay down next to him in the same position and within a few minutes we were both calm again and I was able to put him to bed effortlessly and relaxed. If you don’t remember the next time and have lost the connection with yourself, try this pose for a few minutes and feel how you slowly strengthen the connection with yourself

I hope these tips can help you to feel the connection with yourself again more often and to strengthen your confidence in this.

If you have any questions, you can always send me an email at: hello@nieuwe-mamas.nl, I like to think along with you if you get stuck in something.

And if you want to deepen the connection with yourself through valuable insights and clarifying exercises, sign up here for the FREE masterclass: CONNECTION – The connection with yourself, which you can do at your own pace, where and when you need it (online ) can follow.

In the next (and last) blog of this series I will tell you more about the challenges you can encounter if you start living more and more from your feelings and how you can overcome them.

Love and until the next blog,

Evi – New Mamas

IODINE, of great value to mom and her baby and a booster for feminine beauty and wisdom

IODINE, of great value to mom and her baby and a booster for feminine beauty and wisdom.
By Mariella Wehman, orthomolecular medical therapist – Atelier Vital

Iodine doesn’t sound that fancy. However, don’t underestimate iodine! Iodine is somewhat sacred as a building block for the thyroid hormones T3 and T4. These hormones are necessary for the proper functioning of the thyroid gland, an organ with a beautiful shape. It is shaped like angel wings. And why would that be? To protect you, if you ask me.

Iodine blesses you with femininity and wisdom. Your natural beauty is supported by it. Iodine is food for your thyroid gland. If you nourish your thyroid in the right way, it will shower you with thanks: beautiful skin, warmth, natural weight and mental peace.

Maybe you recognize yourself in the following: coldness in your nose, feet and fingers, unexplained weight gain, prone to depression, fatigue and dry skin, eyes and mouth? Or are you bothered by fluid retention, especially in your legs? There is a good chance that you have an iodine deficiency and that your thyroid gland is not functioning optimally.

The WHO shares that 37% of the Dutch population experiences an iodine deficiency. The chance that you belong to this is therefore quite real. Pregnant women in particular are an important risk group. When you are pregnant, your iodine requirement is increased to support the proper brain development of your unborn child. During the pregnancy, the need for thyroid hormones increases and there is a higher need for iodine. Optimal production of thyroid hormone is vital for the (brain) development of your unborn baby.

Post-natal care for your thyroid

There are a number of classic lifestyle issues that negatively affect the functioning of our thyroid gland: taking a contraceptive pill, prolonged stress and periods in which you sleep less. If you recently became a mom, these themes are very topical in your life. Taking care of your baby often goes together with worrying about your baby, your role, your relationship; which in turn causes stress. It is inevitably you will sleep less after the birth of your baby. Are you breastfeeding? Then you experience that, albeit with a lot of love, you also give energy to your child through breast milk and that you definitely need more nutrients. Unfortunately, an increased chance of unbalancing your thyroid gland.

So, are you pregnant or have you just given birth? Then you now know that you can give your thyroid some extra attention.

For everyone else, certain lifestyle choices can create a disturbance in the absorption of iodine in the body. The consumption of soy products, the intake of aspirins, active sports (through sweating) and a vegetarian lifestyle also cause an iodine deficiency.

Dear mom, and dear mom to be, what can you do to make your thyroid gland work for you to maintain your femininity and wisdom and to support the growth of your child?

Take the Sups RISE or Sups MOM TO BE daily for a dose of vitamins and minerals crucial: iodine, selenium, vitamin D, zinc and B12. Both supjes contain the wonderful daily recommended dosage of iodine of 150 µg. If you are pregnant or breastfeeding, your daily dose of iodine may contain as much as 200 µg. So feel free to supplement with food such as seaweed pasta, food from the sea such as cod, mussels, kelp, (organic) eggs and (organic) Full Milk.

If you read this you will also understand why I think the Sups MOM TO BE supplement is a very valuable maternity gift for your sister or girlfriend! She will be so grateful to you for it, and so will her partner and baby.

A woman empowers a woMOM!

 

Maca, a natural mult vitamin

Maca, a natural mult vitamin
By Mariella Wehman, orthomolecular medical therapist – Atelier Vitaal

“Maca”: the word is somewhat mystical. Exotic too. But despite its magical effects, Maca is “just” a root vegetable. But one with very special properties. Medicinal even. I will tell you how you can benefit optimally from these properties.

Another word for Maca could be “multivitamin” or “energizer”. The benefits that you experience almost immediately after taking Maca are enormous. For women, but also for men. A true gift from Mother Nature, who knows what we need. After all, she created us herself and therefore provides us with only the very best.

Maca (Latin: Lepidium meyenii) grows in the Peruvian Andes Mountains. The Incas used it as a natural stimulant. And that is not without reason. The tuber’s underground stems, whose roots resemble a radish, store nutrients for times of scarcity. Nutrients where you can benefit greatly from! Especially when you are going through rough times. In the event of a setback, an imbalance can arise in several areas, mentally and physically. This can manifest itself in, for example, fatigue, hormone fluctuations and even gloominess. And of course you want to prevent that!

Insight into energy providers and energy guzzlers is crucial. Only when you know what nourishes or harmes your body & mind, you can anticipate problems and offer your body solutions. This offers advantages, for both yourself and your environment. Because how you feel affects the roles you have in life. For example as a mother, partner, girlfriend or colleague.

A crucial role in your hormone balance

We quickly attribute many physical and mental complaints to (a disruption) in our hormone system. And often this is indeed (part of) the cause. What many people don’t know is that you can influence your hormone balance. And thus your energy balance and well-being. Balanced nutrition is the basis for this. and Maca can play a crucial role in this.

Why? Maca gives you wings. Really! Thanks to its very high nutritional values.
Maca contains a hefty dose of B1, B2, vitamins C, E, iron, calcium, magnesium, zinc and iodine. It also contains a lot of fiber, which contributes to a healthy intestinal flora. And that is very important! Because vitality starts in your intestines. The absorption of nutrients, a good hormone balance, becoming and staying vital to pregnancy; in all these processes you need a healthy intestinal flora.

Mystical customization

Does Maca have anything mystical about it? Oh yes! Maca provides you a customized treatment. As an adaptogen, it stimulates the production of hormones or, where necessary, slows it down. In other words; Maca continuously ensures a good balance. A few days after taking it you will notice that Maca is doing its job. You feel more energetic, cheerful and more happy. This helps you to lower your stress level, increases your stamina and even increases your iron levels. Bye anemia! Thanks to the 18 vegetable amino acids that Maca contains, Maca even has a positive effect on the production of muscle tissue. That literally and figuratively makes you the most powerful version of yourself! And as icing on the cake, Maca also has an exotic touch. It increases the libido and fertility of both men and women! A true gift.

And how does Maca actually taste? Caramelly with a soft, nutty flavor.

Preferably take your BALANCE capsule with a green smoothie or mix it with your oatmeal breakfast, for example. This ensures better absorption in your intestines and strengthens the effect of the ingredients.

Recipe with Balance

A treat for yourself: Cacao-Maca Latte.

Mix oat milk with two teaspoons of raw cocoa powder
and the powder from the BALANCE capsule
in a milk frother. Instant energy!

Happy Balance, happy MOM!